Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Midlife Divorce Resource: The Good, The Bad, And The Ugly

Ugh, divorce. Rarely a pretty picture and nearly always long lasting emotional repercussions. Especially if you've been in a longtime marriage and are having to make the tough decision to call it quits well into mid-life. Fear, sadness, anger, uncertainty, all very common side effects. Alas, it is a sad truth that divorce is almost the rule rather than the exception.

I’ve talked to many middle-aged women about their relationships and their marriages. I can even point to a few in one or the other to whom I could point and say, “Hah! Now that’s the kind of relationship I want!”

Mary Lou Serafine made some interesting points in an article on Being Successfully Single that a good question to ask is, “would I rather be in the AVERAGE marriage or relationship, or would I rather be in a rich, fulfilling single life of my own creation?” Hmmm...good question. Most of the ‘average’ partnerships aren’t very motivating from my perspective. But, sometimes even if they aren't the greatest, they ARE ours, they are familiar and it's painful when they break.

So,I wanted to share a site I found that pretty much covers all the aspects of divorce. It’s called, imagine that, Divorce 360. It has articles on everything from how to spot a cheating spouse, to why you should not assume your spouse will be fair and cooperative, to how to find a junkyard attorney if necessary, to how to look after the best interests of your kids to how to move on after the divorce is final. Really, it looks like an incredibly comprehensive site offering tons of useful information that can help you navigate a difficult situation much more gracefully.

They break it into Deciding, Beginning, Process, Ongoing, etc. Under each of those broad headings they break it into Emotional, Legal, Kids, Financial. Pretty slick I thought.

And I expect it’s quite a bit cheaper than a $300/hr attorney.

1 comment:

Suzy Brown said...

Another great site for women going through divorce after a long marriage is www.midlifedivorcerecovery.com . This site has practical resources to help women build the life they desire and deserve after a midlife divorce. The Radical Recovery Book by Suzy Brown is also very helpful with chapters on Surviving, Getting Strong, Getting Organized, Facing Reality, Choosing to Change and Transformation.